Shaq Attack!

I just saw one of the finest moments of television I've seen in a long, long time. I was flipping channels when I came across "Shaq's Big Challenge," a new series in which basketball star Shaquille O'Neal endeavors to help six obese teens lose weight. Tonight's episode may be the first.

I tuned in just in time to see one of the kids beginning one minute of sit-ups, with Shaq holding his feet. As he came upward for his first crunch, he (Hmmm, how shall I put this? There are so very many ways. In honor of the overeating that the kids have all admitted to and are now trying to curb...) cut the cheese. Quite audibly, I might add.*

Shaq: (still holding the kid's feet as the kid continues, with very little success, to do sit-ups) You just farted on me, Walter. You can't be farting on me, Walter.

This is going to be a very good show.

* Was it really necessary for them to keep this precious moment in the show? Not only is this poor kid on national television because he is so dangerously obese that Shaq had to be called in to rectify the situation, he has now farted on the sports icon for all of America to see (and hear). Have a great summer, kid!