In about 36 hours, maybe a little less, we'll know (well, I'll know and then I'll probably share it here in about a month 'cause that seems to be what I do, at the moment) if I am a World Champion!
"For what championship is Michael competing?" you may wonder. "Is he competing against other regional Funniest Jew winners?" "Is there a world's laziest man competition?" "Worst housekeeper in the world?"
No, no, and no to those last three. But if you know of any of those competitions, please let me know. I've been practicing for all of them.
I am a member of Born in the Que-S-A, a team competing in the Memphis in May World Championship Barbecue Cooking Contest, an incredibly smoky and fun festival on the banks of the Mississippi River in downtown Memphis. It started a couple of days ago and judging is tomorrow.
I don't really know how they judge and rank 200 or so different ribs, but hopefully they'll rank us first! I'll keep you posted. If we win, I assume the Memphis community will be throwing us a ticker-tape parade. Maybe we'll be invited to the White House. Who knows?!?
Now, please enjoy the story, told through facebook status updates, of my drive home from the first night of the contest. It is a little reminiscent of unexpected, undesired, unenjoyable late night car adventures of the past:
Michael Danziger Is stuck in traffic. You'd think that'd be some kind of metaphor at 11:30 at night, but it's not.Wed 11:33pm · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger May very well spend the night on I-240.Wed 11:54pm · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Is glad he used the port-o-potty before leaving bbq fest. Interstate wait: one hour and counting.Yesterday at 12:13am · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Has gone 1/10 of a mile in the last 80 minutes...in a car.Yesterday at 12:38am · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Will get home early next Wednesday morning, at this rate, but they'll probably clear the road sooner.Yesterday at 12:45am · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Sees a police car ahead moving! Does this mean I might also move soon?Yesterday at 1:06am · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Is about to move! .3 miles in 2 hours!Yesterday at 1:12am · Comment · LikeUnlike
Michael Danziger Is home. 2 1/2 hours after leaving downtown. It would have been faster to go the other direction to Little Rock!Yesterday at 1:39am · Comment · LikeUnlike
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