Tuesday, June 10, 2003

The Most Disturbing Thing In My House

Those who know me will vouch for me when I assert that I am not a neat freak. I'm not unsanitary, mind you, but I'm not always quick about discarding items that I could never possibly have use for again. As a result, I have some pretty funny, and sometimes disturbing things in my possession. The most disturbing, ironically, is one of the housekeeping implements that I, and hopefully you, own. The absolute most disturbing item in my house is the toilet brush. In a society where almost everything is available in a disposable form, we still keep this cheap piece of plastic that is used to scrape old, well, toilet contents, off the walls of the toilet because they didn't go away the first time we tried to get rid of them. It astounds, dumbfounds, and, yes, I would go so far as to say, flabbergasts me, just thinking about the fact that, as a society, we make a habit of keeping these things in our homes.

So I invite my fellow Americans... No! I invite all of humanity to join me in taking our disposable culture just one logical step further. Sure, it goes against all the reuse-reduce-recycle conservationist ideas that we have tried to build within ourselves to combat our wastefulness, but you know what? It just makes sense. I don't know how we missed it until now, but it is not too late. Join me! Make your house less disturbing by throwing away that repository of filth, stimulate the economy by buying a new one when your toilets are ready for their next cleaning, and in your own very small way, change the world!

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